Johnny Rockets, Master of Distraction

The Man of the Place and I had an impromptu date tonight. My good friend called to invite our son to see Prince Caspian with her son. Thinking quick, I offered her more money to take all three of our wildebeasts children along. The silly woman agreed!

So The Man and I ended up over at The Shoppes at Montage, a new shopping center “over Scranton way”. After spending a half hour or so wandering around in The Guitar Center (The Man is a musician, of course) weThe Most Tasteless Food in the East decided to eat at Johnny Rockets, against our better judgement.

The last time we were there, I had the opportunity to have the worst apple pie in my life. I had never tasted such tasteless apple pie. Well, it was tasteless with a bit of a salty overtone (or undertone…). The coffee was good though, and since I live for coffee, the night wasn’t a total waste. However, I did the unthinkable and actually left most of my apple pie on my plate and filled my tummy with several more cups of coffee.

So anyway, we decided to go to Johnny Rockets to spend the $28 left on our gift card. I do like the 1950’s do-wop atmosphere, and was eager to pretend I was a teenybopper in a poodle skirt and saddle shoes. The best I could do was order a cheeseburger, fries, onion rings, and a milkshake. The Man told me that milkshakes were for dessert, and I told him he was born in the wrong era. Richie and Potsie always had shakes with their burgers.

I finally know why the staff at Johnny Rockets comes out every so often to line dance and make fools of themselves for the restaurant patrons: it is to distract us from the completely tasteless organic matter that is supposed to be our meal.

Never in my life have I left French fries and a cheeseburger on my plate. Until tonight. The strawberry shake was good, as was the coffee I requested to replace the meal I could not eat. The Man was happy with his chili dog, though.

From now on, it’s either The Boathouse on Lake Wallenpaupack, or Red Robin in Dickson City when I’m hankering for a burger. If only The Man would croon Blue Velvet or something while I ate – but you can’t have everything.


4 thoughts on “Johnny Rockets, Master of Distraction

  1. Bleck. I hate Johnny Rockets. We’ve also never “officially” eaten at The Boathouse. We sat down and saw that they wanted $8 for a kids lunch and walked out. I’ve never paid more than $4 anywhere…ok except maybe the Alpine. But that’s because the service there is bar none.

    Have you tried Texas Roadhouse for a good burger? My husband says they’re good there; I usually get the steak & sweet potato. Yum.

    Oh–I’m jealous you got a date with your husband. That never happens around here, no one seems to want to wrangle with 4 kids. lol.

  2. Hi Shannon, thanks for stopping by! I don’t get these dates too often – and I feel your pain. We have no grandparents or nearby relatives to watch our kids so we’re at the mercy of friends when we want to go out! LOL

    I thought the Boathouse kids menu was expensive too until I realized that it did include a nice serving of ice cream plus their drinks – no junky toy like McDondalds, but hey…lol. But when you multiply it by 3 and 4 it significantly adds to your bill. We usually don’t go there with the kids….or at least, not all of them! LOL

    We’ve been meaning to try the Texas Roadhouse – just haven’t had the opportunity yet. We did like Panera Bread – though that’s another place to go sans kids due to price.

  3. I have to agree JR’s is pretty bad, how ever their shakes are good.
    But thats it just the shakes.
    Oh yeah and don’t get me started on how expensive they are.
    I wrote a review of JR’s in San Jose, California, slightly different than yours.

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